2014 has been a hard ass chemistry teacher who completely overwhelmed you, but ultimately proved to you that you’re made of more than you thought you were when the semester began.
It’s been an unruly, curvaceous year.
It’s a year that established that sometimes compromises aren’t possible. Sometimes there really isn’t any such thing as agreeing to disagree. Sometimes it’s necessary to take a stand. And sometimes your faith is so shaken you don’t even know how to pray anymore.
Alas, every year has golden moments that you want to take with you…moments you want to hold close to your heart and never forget:
-Cade’s uncontrollable laughter the moment he felt the Atlantic Ocean taking the sand from beneath his toes as he stood there, looking out at the Sea through almost 3 year old eyes.
-Lyla’s wondrous look of disbelief as she looked at a book and read a word for the first time ever…all by herself.
-A trip to the Dominican Republic that awakened Old Love, Youth and the hope that real friendships do still exist.
-Seeing my baby sister become a Mommy. It’s a sweeter experience than I ever imagined it would be.
-Turning 40. Celebrating life and feeling so unbelievably fortunate to be surrounded by my sisters and my family and friends.
-Encountering the lifeboat of unconditional support when I don’t know what I would have done without it. This has reaffirmed my faith in God during a very dark time as I have ridden waves along with people who were able to understand my deepest 2014 struggles in a way that no one else could have.
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2014 has also been epitomized by unbelievable, unfathomable tragedy, broken friendships and parenting challenges we never expected:
1. Sometimes you have to take a stand. And sometimes it isn’t popular. People don’t like it, and they sure as hell don’t understand it. But you have to do it. You have to show yourself, your partner and the rest of the world what you’re willing to take. And what you’re not.
2. 2014 gave us the faith shaker of a lifetime - the Brice & Briana tragedy was and remains unfathomable. And it’s changed absolutely everything. I’m trying to figure out how to pray again and what exactly God is doing up there. I have fewer answers than I thought I had before the year began.
3. There are some bad people out there. They’re cruel. They’re self serving. They’re mean. They betray you. They lie. And sometimes they don’t wear black and look like thieves. It is our job to protect our family from these people, and I’ve learned that when it comes right down to it, it’s eerily simple for us to do exactly what needs to be done.
My Dad once told me that I had what it took to stand up for myself when it matters.
He was right.
4. It really does take “A Village”, albeit a small, very carefully chosen “Village”. Discovering the strength and unconditional friendship of strong, healthy families has been of immeasurable reassurance to our Family of 4. I’ve learned the importance of identifying who I want to parent with…and that these are deeper, more important relationships than I ever imagined. They are the sustenance of parenthood.
I just saw a Facebook post that said, “I’m not the person I was when the year began.” Yes. Yes. And Yes. I’m definitely not.
I won’t be sad when the clock strikes midnight tonight. I will think about the challenging teacher 2014 has been, and how grateful I am that this year, I’m way more thankful for my blessings than I was this time a year ago.
So, here’s to 2015. Here’s to hope, happiness and the love surrounding our sweet family.
It’s going to be a good one.
jj
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